Procrastinating

I really dont wanna do my Java program... =_=

So Sammy and I were watching a bunch of videos from freshman year - god my hair was so SHORT! And I had braces and looked so pissy! Haha, the squeak has stayed the same though, after all this time. I left my bag in her mom's car, which had New Moon and Inkheart in it - she had better remember it tomorrow or Ill ring her neck.

Mike's still pretty sick =/ Man, I love that damn kid. He's so incredibly sweet and wonderful and I really cant help but smile when he looks at me... *eyes glaze over* *girly sigh* It would be so worthless to be a sociopath - emotions like these are what make life worth living - no matter how mundane it is, and no matter how unique. Because in a way, everything that happens to everyone is unique - sure the same things might happen in a general sense, but I mean... I will never experience the same feelings I do laying in his arms with him, no one else knows what it's like to have him stare into my eyes and whisper "I love you" except for me... Its like that old quote, "Would you rather be something to everyone or everything to some one?" Personally, I enjoy my little black box with its skeleton key, I enjoy the life I've chose, the path Im walking on.

It brought me Mike, so it can't be all bad, can it? It brought me Jekka and Sammy too, and even little Eppie, so something has to be going right - something has to be looking out for me, making sure that I dont stray too far and push away too many people.

Being happy really doesnt take that much work. It's hard to be constantly happy, but who wants all that repetiveness on a daily basis? The pain makes the happy so worth it, so when they way out you can be balanced. Balance. That's what it's really all about.

I love him. I am so incredibly in love with him, I cant think of anything else at this moment in time. It makes me so happy when he tells me he thinks of me throughout the day. And I finally figured out what to do for Valentines Day. I really do enjoy things in sets of three... Three's a good number.

Haha. I wonder how we develop such strange quirks and thought patterns as we age. Is it our influences? Our parents, our friends, the books we read, movies we watch, games we play? Why is the human mind so different from person to person?

It's a mystery I really dont want to be solved. If they figure out what makes us so different, would they try to make us all the same? I have my own personality quirks, I can subjugate myself and judge my personality with my own mind, though it may be a bit biased, I kind of like who Im turning out to be. True, there are some minor adjustments Id like to make, but hell, I have my whole life to mold myself.

My whole life. A life that's been filled with so much already - so many twists and turns. It's ashame that life doesnt have any bright yellow signs telling you when to slow down or to beware of falling rocks. But god, how I adore this crazy, crazy life.

I wonder what will happen next?